Moments of Laughter and Kindness

My dear friends-

I've been keeping some lists that I thought I would share with you. Please enjoy these funny moments, odd tidbits, and stories of great kindnesses, and forgive their disjunct nature.

Moments of Laughter

1) Every night at 7:50 pm, I go with all of the girls in the hostel to prayer time. A few Malayalam hymns are sung and a Scripture passage read, then the girls can remain for silent prayer as long as they desire. Each Wednesday night, they sing an English hymn. Usually I'm in charge of leading these, but this particular night, I had forgotten that it was Wednesday. The number for the prayer was called out, and Shalu, my dear friend and companion, pointed towards hymn number 17 and nudged me, saying, "Sing! Sing!" because I had forgotten that I usually start. I started singing, but no one joined in. After two lines, I just kind of awkwardly faded out into silence because no one was joining me! There was a hilarious moment of completely tangible awkward silence before the girls started singing hymn number seventy, not seventeen. Shalu had accidentally heard the wrong number. She and I sat, shaking silently with laughter, for the rest of prayer time, and once we were out of the prayer hall all the girls burst out laughing. It was hilarious.

2) As previously mentioned, I always share with a new class pictures of my family. I find it interesting that when I mention, "stepmother," most kids look confused, and I have to take the time to explain what a stepmother is. Interesting.

3) I had a hilarious moment the other day when a girl I know came out from a classroom having just finished an exam on Macbeth. I quickly urged her not to speak the word, which surprised her, and then proceeded to try to explain why we don't say the word 'Macbeth.' In the midst of trying to explain to her with minimal English understanding and broken Malayalam, I realized that I didn't actually know why we refer to it as "The Scottish Play" instead of by the title. It was a very confusing conversation. 

4) I find myself continually making puns that no one understands. I miss being able to play with words and make witty comments that others can understand! :) For example, the other week when I was teaching at Baker Girls' School, I was showing them on a globe where I'm from. It was an old, rusty globe, and at that moment happened to just completely break and fall apart in my hands. I melodramatically shouted, "My world is falling apart!" and looked out into a sea of noncomprehending faces wondering why I was freaking out so much about a broken globe. Haha.

5) Interestingly, I recently was asked to be interviewed for The Times newspaper, as one of the women in the Faculty Voice Class has a brother who writes for them. We had arranged a time to meet when I was wisely told that interviewing would not be a good idea, as the reason for my being here according to my visa and my actual work here are entirely two different things. I forgot about this. Technically, for those of you that don't know, I am a student at CMS College in the one-year "Community Development Internship," which is how the YAVs are able to come into the country. It was a good thing I was not interviewed about my activities, because I would have talked all about my teaching and volunteering at local schools, and if this information were published in the newspaper, it could have led to some trouble. What a close shave! I'm glad that I am no longer in danger of potentially getting myself arrested. :)

6) While at a home stay recently, I had a shocking moment: It was about two am, and I was having trouble sleeping. Right on the other side of the wall was the mother of the person who's house I was staying at, and she talks in her sleep. She also sings and argues in Malayalam in her sleep. It took me a very long time to realize that she was sleeptalking. I was already feeling a little freaked out by this, and so I got up to use the restroom. But the door I opened did not lead to the restroom, it led to the servant's quarters! I had no idea that there was a servant in the house, and as I opened the door I was completely surprised to find another person sleeping there, a person I hadn't met! This is an element of the homes here that I have not yet touched upon-many of the homes here have a servant or a helper who lives with the family. Sometimes you know they're there and meet them, and sometimes you stumble upon them at 2 am and wake them up. Whoops.

7) A couple weeks ago, two teachers from the English department took me into town because I'd mentioned that I'd like to buy some games for girls at the hostel. The reason for this was that my parents had mailed me a deck of UNO cards a few weeks back. These UNO cards are being played CONSTANTLY. I can't believe how much amusement is being derived from this deck of cards that now look like they're years old! I went out and bought two more decks, and also a badminton set, a frisbee, Scrabble, Life, and Checkers. It has been an incredible joy to introduce these games to the girls and I am continually refreshed and amazed at how much joy they derive from them! Especially interesting has been the Life game, which is based on the American life. It is interesting to note their reactions to the elements of this board game, such as careers, salaries, marriage, etc., and has served as a great teaching tool.

8) The concept of raising your hand to be called on is an entirely new concept to students here. (They're used to responding in unison.) I spent much of my last time at Baker trying to teach the students how this works, with some rather humorous results, (i.e. not realizing that a response is expected once one has raised their hand :). 

9) Many elements of musical understanding that I take for granted in the U.S., such as being able to clap or move to a beat, are sometimes not present here, which is interesting and funny to discover.

10) I never ceased to be amazed at all the new elements of communication and cultural idiosyncrasies that I encounter. For example, tonight at dinner one of the girls was choking slightly, and instead of someone patting her on the back as we would do at home, the girl across from her gave her a sharp rap on the top of her head! And there are countless phrases that amuse me. For example, "What's your program?" means, "What are you doing right now?" and "Shall we move?" is not an invitation to dance, but means "Should we get going?" I find myself using these phrases frequently. Also, when I talk with the girls at the hostel, they always ask, "May I go?" at what might be the end of the conversation before moving away from me, even in the smallest interaction. It's like asking, "Are we done talking?" I also am amused by the blunt (to me) way conversations seem to end. I feel very frequently here that when I'm on the phone with someone or talking with them, they say, "Ok, goodbye" the second they're done and just hang up or walk away! There's no real indication that the conversation is gradually coming to a close, or even a chance to hear the other person say goodbye. And of course this rambling would not be complete without a mention of the quintessential Indian head bob, which I think I've finally gotten used to. In the U.S. when we mean, "No" we shake our heads from side to side, and nod up and down to mean, "Yes." Here, shaking your head in a kind of wobble back and forth means anything from "yes" to "ok" or "I understand" and many other things I don't know yet. It is very different to be teaching students and to ask if they understand to see them shake their heads in response-I have to constantly remind myself that they are saying "yes" and not "no." Sometimes the way someone bobs their head looks just like our "No." This takes getting used to. (Imagine telling someone your name and where you're from with them all the while shaking their head from side to side in what looks to you like a clear "No" as though they're disagreeing with you.) Fascinating.

11) A while back I had expressed interest in teaching some conversational English to the History students of the college. One day, I was asked if I wanted to go teach them right then and there! I felt fully confident until I walked into the classroom and realized that there were about 6 girls and 35 college boys. I quickly realized that all of my silly songs and activities I do with the Baker School girls or my tiny Home Science group were not going to work. Three cheers for major improvisation!

12) During my first Thursday at Baker School, I went to teach my first class when I noticed that it was going abnormally long. I was given a schedule of the class times. I found out after teaching two periods together that the school follows an entirely different schedule on Thursdays. Surprise! :)

13) I am astonished by how much of my college education I'm using here. I wrack my brain trying to remember all that I learned in my choral education classes so that I can teach these concepts here. I've used every song I can remember from student teaching. Who would've thought that everything I learned in college I would now be trying to teach to others in a place as far away as Kerala? It's amazing-such a blessing to have such a direct use of my skills and background.

14) I recently visited Jecko and Ann's house. (Jecko, a CMS English professor, along with his wife and son, Steve, accompanied us back at the beginning of the month on our boat ride, if you remember their pictures). While playing badminton with Steve, I learned that he loves "The Sound of Music," and so we played badminton while singing songs from the movie together for at least a half hour, also with him quoting the dialogue in between the songs! It was amazing! I had to be back at the hostel shortly afterwards, and so Steve walked me back. I was only two minutes late, but the gate was locked. I was let in by the watchman, but the girls were probably wondering why I was showing up three minutes late, out of breath, with a thirteen-year-old boy, singing Edelweiss. :)

Moments of Kindness (too many to count)

1) About a week ago, I mentioned to Gigi Sir that I would at some point like to think about getting a mirror to put in the office for when I teach voice lessons. He returned a couple of hours later from being in town, with a perfect mirror that he affixed to the wall, just because I'd mentioned it. Gigi Sir's kindness and thoughtfulness knows no bounds.

2) I locked myself out of my room recently, and Gigi Sir was so kind to take time out of his Saturday to come all the way from his house to give me the extra key. What would I do without him?

3) Recently, a friend from Mixed Voices, Jibi, came to the hostel to have me work on a Finale file. She came with two full bags of continental food-sandwiches, french fries, and garlic bread! She would not let me thank her or pay her back. Jibi has shown me kindness like this on countless occasions, and I am so grateful for her.

4) Sumita is a very special girl at the hostel with a beaming smile that shines her love of Christ. I walked past her one evening in the hostel, where I saw her doodling, "Jesus is My Best Friend" at the top of all her papers, and smiling to herself. My heart burst-what a precious child of God! I sat down next to her and told her that we have the same best friend! She told me about her love of Jesus and about how she wants to work as a missionary in Andhra Pradesh. She gave me a bookmark from the mission agency that she wants to work with, and wrote me a sweet note on the bookmark. I will treasure this always, and think of her brilliant smile and the way she radiates God's love. I strive to be more like Sumita.

5) When the girls celebrate a birthday, they bring in cake and candy to share with everyone. Instead of receiving presents, they give them, and always knock on my door to bring me a treat. What would we be like if we gave of ourselves more instead of expecting to receive, on our birthday? Or every day?

6) Last week my clothes were on the line hanging to dry when it started to rain. When I came out to get them, one of the girls had already taken all of my clothes and hung them up in her room so that they wouldn't get wet. I was really touched.

7) Recently at a hostel English class,  a girl stopped by to see what was going on but said that she couldn't stay for class. However, she joined the class anyhow. After class, she very formally thanked me, pronounced the class "awesome and exciting," shook my hand, and told me that she liked me. I told her that I had greatly appreciated her being there and that I liked her, too. :) Haha! I so appreciated that she took the time to tell me that she appreciated me and that she enjoyed learning from me. What a blessing-such open communication!

8) When caught in a downpour last week, an Achen I know insisted on loaning me his umbrella. He said he had another with him, but I didn't see one.

9) Bugs, lizards, mice, oh my! In my room I am becoming acquainted with a whole variety of new friends:three-inch cockroaches, huge mosquitoes, snails, geckos, lots of millipedes, and even a mouse! Hilariously, once I realized I had a mouse in my room, I told the warden, and about fifteen minutes later received a call from the Principal of the College himself apologizing for the mouse and insisting that he send carpenters the very next day to install nets over my windows. And he did, and they came the next day to do so! I couldn't get over this. About a week later the Principal also called me to ask, "Would you like a refrigerator?" to which I responded, "No, thank you" and promptly found a fridge installed in my room the next day.

10) Sometimes after I dismiss the hostel choir, they linger to chat with me. Recently, they gathered around me asking questions, and I shared with them about what it's like to come to India, and what's hard sometimes. One of them later found me and told me that she has a great respect for me and she never thought about how hard it would be to go so afar away and be from her family. She told me that she had liked me since I came to the hostel, but she hadn't thought until tonight about 'what a brave thing it is for you to come so far away to be with us.' I was choked up. These girls are precious children of God. They are so innocent, and so honest. 

I am surrounded by kindnesses, blatant and subtle, if I will but open my eyes to see them. So, too, I think, are you. Are we just seeing, or are we understanding? If I look around me, especially with an open heart and not just open eyes, I see God's hand in these manifold kindnesses between people. May I be a passer-on of these kindnesses, andmay I not stop or hinder the flow. May I give back more than I receive (and I'm certainly receiving a lot.) As I stumble my way around this foreign land, many hands reach out to assist me. To keep me from a fall, from a blunder, to hand me a gift, to pass on a kind word. Many hands and many hearts. Doors and hearts opened to me, may I open mine as well. It's funny how I think that I came to serve...when in truth I am really being taught how to serve.

When we become aware that our stuttering, failing, vulnerable selves are loved even when we hardly progress, we can let go of our compulsion to prove ourselves and be free to live with others in a fellowship of the weak. That is true healing. 

- Henri J.M. Nouwen